Monday, January 28, 2008

Doug is mad at the world!

angst post that kind of gave a background to the song performed at lny


*edit*

ok, no i don't really drink, smoke, do drugs, or have sex. i do play poker though.

ok this wasn't supposed to be an attack on fobs in general, but fobs who hate on me.

and no, this wasn't an attack on twinkies in general, but again twinkies who hate on me.

thank you very much.

oh yea...unc sucks btw. stupid may, that fat punk was crying and cursing and wahing when he got injured...he should get that newb tattoo removed.

*end edit*

so apparently the edens 3b crew and i are wastes of life because we

a) don't leave our dorm
b) drink, smoke, drugs, have sex, gamble our lives away and any other vice you can imagine
c) play video games
d) play poker
e) don't leave our dorm

and not only that i'm insecure and a disgrace to koreans because i

a) don't know how to speak korean well
b) don't leave my dorm
c) play poker
d) am an asian american guy at duke
e) just suck apparently
f) and you guessed it. don't leave my dorm

well that's fine i suppose. what i don't like about all this is how people expect me to live my life the way they expect me to. to be what they want me to be. which is why i don't conform to the norm. but i'll tell you why i do these things.

i suck at korean. this is a known fact that my best friend always reminds me of. so does my sister. it's not that i didn't try. i wrote in my little journal and went to korean school and shit like that. my mom was a korean school teacher who thought i was a disgrace in korean. i just wasn't interested in it. period. i just sucked and that's that. i wasn't interested in those pussy ass dramas that have the same story line everytime that you learn korean from. i'm not a linguistics kind of guy, as french was my worst subject in school. but you know what, whatever the fuck ever. i was born in yonkers, ny, which if i remember correctly is in a country that's main language is english. correct me if i'm wrong here. i also don't like kim chi, or any hot food, and apparently i look chinese. do i care? why should i be any more korean than i have to be. i'll be just as korean as i fuck well please thank you very much.

edens is the farthest quad from main west. it's almost as far as central. and on top of that, we live in the farthest dorm in edens. obviously i'm a lazy ass, so i'm going to sit here and stay with my friends who all live in the same place anyway. why go out to eat when you can just order in. is there something special going on at the great hall? is it a carnival out there? should i just go out in cold weather because i have to? why not just stay in my nice dorm where i can just sleep, eat, and be however lazy i want to be? why do i HAVE to leave my building.

poker is a game i enjoy playing because it challenges my mind. there are new aspects of the game i learn everyday. true you can lose even with the best of it, but players guided by logic and reason can win consistently. i guess this is the part where i'm gambling my life away, but hardly so. but whatever, i consider it as another hobby i have.

as an asian american guy at duke, you can't have it good either way. you have fobs who basically don't acknowledge your presence like a COB (captain of the boat) or asian twinkies who basically hate all things asian, or you have white frat boys who you just want to punch in the face for their racist ways. you also are on the bottom of the food chain for relationships...no wonder we don't leave our dorm.

i guess i just suck. this i can't argue against. but you know what. you suck too.

i don't leave my dorm again, because i don't.

"soy un perdedor,
i'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me"

-beck

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